The Colour Of Food

I am not what you’d call a fat guy. Nope. But I do have a belly big enough to qualify as a temple priest. Hang on. It’s not that big. Maybe just nice for a politician.

Each time I make a trip back home, or if my parents come up here to KL, anxiety would strike me. It’s that bad, because my mom would be making comments on my weight.

And it happened this time around. Even my dad got it. His waist size got two inches larger. All his life he had been a 30 and now its 32. Shocking!!! And the attention was later turned on me.

So, that’s it. I got to go on diet. This is actually a sequel. Diet Pt 13, may be. So, for help I did what an independent, intelligent, resourceful guy would do, search the internet.

After deliberating many cliché ridden advises, I came across this:

“In the USDA Dietary Guidelines for Americans 2005, it calls for Americans to eat more dark green and orange vegetables. Use lunchtime as an opportunity to get those veggie servings with the inclusion of a simple salad of, say, green leaf lettuce and shredded carrot.”

Haha. Bloody Americans. Always with their obese problem. I am not an obese but this sounds like a good advice. Dark green and orange vegetable, huh?

ARE YOU FREAKIN’ KIDDING ME????

How the hell would I know dark green and orange vegetable? I am colour blind, for Picasso’s sake. For all you know I might be crunching on purple vege and some Alien from outerspace would come avenging the death of its uncle.

There are so many diet schemes out there, for e.g. Vege diet, Protein diet, Atkins diet, Olsen twin’s diet(also known as third world diet) and Diet Coke. So many choices.

Also, I noted that most diet plans are meant for women. I mean, come on. We too are afflicted with that problem. So, I did more research (I need more funds here for research) and came up with this:

Weight Loss Advice for Men
Be sensible about alcohol.
You don't have to give up

Take some regular exercise.
You don't have to jog your butt off

Eat less red meat.
You don't have to eat lentils

Eat less fast food
Home cooked food isn't necessarily slow food


And the advice ended with this statement:

"Don't wait until you're in the ER to find out about your cholesterol and blood pressure. You may not survive that long."

Makes you feel good, doesn't it?

But the advice looks sound. Simple. Very traditional. So, I am going to start today. I am going to follow what the above said, especially the one in italics.