Gladiator 2 (2024).

A quarter of a century has passed since the Gladiator premiered all over the world. I was 24 years old at the time, working in Singapore. I had just started taming myself as a cinephile, a movie nut, or a celluloid freak, if you will.

 I had watched Russell Crowe in LA Confidential before and saw a magazine cover proclaiming that he is the next Brando. You kidding me? I watched Gladiator later, and my jaw dropped. He is a mix of the classic Hollywood stars like Heston and Mitchum, plus Brando and de Niro. The dude has it.

 Plus, he made me cry. I cry only to Tamil films starring Sivaji Ganesan, Kamal Haasan, or Rajinikanth. But Russell Crowe? Dammit, man!

 Now, fast forward to the 25-year mark, and the same director, Ridley Scott, released a sequel. A goddamned sequel. Nobody asked for it. The hell is wrong with him? When it was announced, I just facepalmed and said, it ain't gonna work.

 And watching it, it exactly was how all of us (yeah, many were facepalming to the point that their mothers couldn't recognise the kids) had imagined. It's not as good as the first.

 But is it bad? I never liked almost all of what Ridley Scott has directed since the first Gladiator. Even Napoleon was a snoozefest.

 Now that Crowe's character kicked the bucket in the first film, I had nothing to look forward to in this film. I told myself that it's going to stink so bad that I would crawl my way back towards the movie theater exit.

 But.

 Yes. But.

Lately,  I had this habit of watching important films on big screen right after lunch. Yeah, you get sleepy, and will the film engage you? My favourite director's film failed that test.

 I had pasta, Marinara, then apple pie. I walked in, knowing well that I was going to have a great nap. Early YouTube reviews were, well, negative. So what.

 But whaddya know. I was engaged. Marinara failed, and so did the goddamned apple pie.

 You see, when they announced that Denzel Washington was gonna be in this movie, I went, “Oh, come on!”. I mean, he is a great actor, but he ain't no Meryll Streep, the chameleon of a performer. Washington basically does a lot of grimacing, lip-smacking, shit, and stuff. No. He is more of an Eastwood kinda performer, limited but knows how to draw the gun and hit the target.

 Yet, I can see why Scott chose him. Thanks to Washington's performance in Training Day (2001), dry, negative, and, as they say in the industry, typed against cast, he was a triumph in this film. He is the livewire. Without him, there is no film.

 Look, I had always had this opinion, if I may, that Denzel is overrated. He is mostly himself, but in a classic sort of way, say, Steve McQueen—a great actor who always brings magic to each film.

 And that is exactly what he brought to the film. Take him out, and the film collapses like a frameless circus tent.

 There are one too many Collesuem fight scenes, which may bore some out, but they are intriguing. All the onscreen performers did their best, and I was so overjoyed to see Connie Nielsen again. Never aged (there is a flashback scene where I suppose they did about 17 minutes of work to de-age her). I fell in love with her in the first film, and well, I injured myself this time. Oh, she's a great actress too.

 The Mescal and Pascal dudes did their job well. I think the whole thing about connecting to the first film is a bit of a whacky con job just to satisfy the fans of the earlier film, with even clips with Crowe shoved in (it could have been dealt with with just dialogues alone), but what the hell?

 Yet, I liked it. It's not going to be a classic like the 1999 flick, no way. But watched on its own, it has its own merit. It's alright. But unlike the first one, I do not think I would wanna rewatch it. And despite that, 
I shall just give it a thumbs up.

 

 

Red One (2024)

Just posted a rather short review of Wicked. Now here comes an even shorter one.

Whoever thought The Rock would be a great movie star, maybe prophetic. But if they thought that he is the next Schwarzenegger... feggedaboutit.

As much as you can complain about Arnie’s acting, the man still had some stuff in him. With exception of heavy drama, he works well in any given genre.

That is not the case with Dwayne Johnson. He has probably three sets of expressions, and I am very generous here. I could never understand his so-called "charisma." He is too annoying, begs for attention, and, hell, annoying. And I hate the fact that he is well known for his eyebrow schtick. Have you heard of Sean Connery?

The film is stupid. There, I said it. And almost all the critics out there hate it. The premise of Santa Claus being kidnapped could have been worked into an awesome adventure fantasy flick instead of another vehicle for The Rock.

J.K. Simmons is fine as Santa. I liked Chris Evans, but his “whoa” looks can be grating at times, but he did fine with whatever material he has.

So, there you go. I think this is even shorter than my Wicked review. The critics already created a bomb crater for this missile to hit.

Wicked (2024}

I, for one, am not a fan of fantasy flicks; no Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings films were too heavy handed to me. I only watched the first two anyway.

And that, plus musical? The only Hollywood musical I enjoyed was The Blues Brothers (1980) and a slew of the pre-1960s stuff. Boy was in for a treat.

I didn’t quite enjoy myself. Sure, the production design was fabulous, and the CGI deployed is apt, considering the subject matter. But it was a drag, up to the point the two leads, played by Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande, meet the wizard, played with such relish by the one and only Jeff Goldblum.

Basically, being the sweet musical that it aspires to be, there is not much conflict, not much obstruction, in what would be some sort of road journey—after all, this is an adaptation of a book that is a prequel to The Wizard of Oz. A sort of origin story to the Witch, that is. Except that she is supposed to be... Wicked, yes, and...evil?

It’s boring as hell, except Grande managed to be cute and funny and steals the show here and there, as if that is necessary. Goldblum, is Goldblum... He is a delight even when reading a phone book (don’t tempt him; he is such a crowd-pleaser).

There’s supposed to be a part two? Ugh…